Thursday, September 22, 2022

Nonsenses Working Overtime


Inconsistent, contradictory and patronising. No, it's not Swindon Borough Council's new mission statement, but it's apparent application of the guidelines regarding the mourning period for The Queen.

Just two days before, the XTC convention booked well in advance at the Steam Museum was cancelled by SBC due to it's inappropriateness in light of the death of The Queen. The organisers then scrambled for alternative venues. 

However, the previous weekend, less than a day and a half after the death announcement, the Swindon Railway Festival, which regularly attracts thousands of people and likely brings in a chunk of the annual Steam revenue, went ahead as advertised. 

So what made the Festival less objectionable in the mourning period than the Convention? It would look to be the poor interpretation of the guidelines by SBC. In their press statement they mention the playing of live and recorded music and other events with the same being cancelled. But the guidelines only mention these events being reconsidered on the day of the funeral itself, if music is featured. 

The outcome of all this is a contradictory and inconsistent impression being given of those who govern Swindon. The input of councillors and officers to the decisions on which events went ahead and those that didn't remains to be determined, most likely it was a combination of both that led to this fudge. 

Did the Council receive an avalanche of complaints about the inappropriateness of the Festival going ahead? Doubtful. Did the commercial revenue expected from one large event going ahead and one smaller one not figure in their decision-making? Who knows.

Swindon needs councillors and officers in charge who make decisions rooted in equal parts common sense and consistency. Clearly neither were present when they got into a spin reading a simple gov.uk page that they still interpreted inconsistently. 

The Mayors of Simpleton, clearly.

Sunday, June 20, 2021

Top Ten Things Overheard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 576

Click here for the original at this brilliant idea, here's our own (socially-distanced) version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10.

9. It's about as surprising as that tint in your hair.

8.

7. I reckon he'll delay, then he'll quit and get divorced.

6.

5. The way they're going, they'll lose their tops.

4.

3. It was yellow and moving very fast, but it could have been a banana on wheels.

2.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. You can't corrupt me, you're about 50 years too late.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Sunday, June 13, 2021

Top Ten Things Overheard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 575

Click here for the original at this brilliant idea, here's our own (socially-distanced) version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10.

9. It's so light in the mornings I don't need to put the light on to look for one of my kids.

8.

7. He listened with both ears, but one's all mashed up.

6.

5. I've only just put away my big jumper.

4.

3. Taking it one step at a time will take longer than I've got patience.

2.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. Just because you make it sound all cutesy, it doesn't mean I'm going to like what you say.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Top Ten Things Overheard On Swindon's Buses Last (Last) Week ; 574

Click here for the original at this brilliant idea, here's our own (socially-distanced) version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10.

9. He's progressively taking over the street with cobbling.

8.

7. If it's got walls then it's classed as indoors.

6.

5. When we got there they'd sold out of all the proper-sized ones, we had to get fun-sized.

4.

3. I wouldn't trust him to run a generator.

2.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. Kay has aligned herself with Phil's brother-in-law, even though the law would question that definition of family-link.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know. 

Sunday, May 30, 2021

Top Ten Things Overheard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 573

Click here for the original at this brilliant idea, here's our own (socially-distanced) version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10.

9. You can't be that blatant with a huge pair of sunglasses and a cap on backwards.

8.

7. I whizzed it over to her and she clearly could walk and get it herself.

6.

5. That pastry always me with a hollow feeling.

4.

3. I tried to take them with me, but if they don't want to come, I can't help it.

2.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. It's only been half-defeated, much like my footie team.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Top Ten Things Overheard On Swindon's Buses Last (Last) Week ; 572

Click here for the original at this brilliant idea, here's our own (socially-distanced) version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10.

9. More of my street has gone sage.

8.

7. My system simply won't stomach that.

6.

5. I was no longer in the inner circle by then.

4.

3. I don't think that app shows you the buses you want.

2.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. If you slide it side on you'll be able to see the whole fish.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Sunday, May 16, 2021

Top Ten Things Overheard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 571

Click here for the original at this brilliant idea, here's our own (socially-distanced) version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10.

9. I expect at a later date we'll find her interest in him buried under the patio.

8.

7. Why didn't they check the paperwork before giving him the large button?

6.

5. Once it started raining that ruined the film for me.

4.

3. He's not her husband, but she pretends he is.

2.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. If I could, I'd wallpaper over this entire year gone.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Saturday, May 15, 2021

Top Ten Things Overheard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 570

Click here for the original at this brilliant idea, here's our own (socially-distanced) version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10.

9. I don't care that much about Claire, not since I grew out my hair.

8.

7. Making something clear is just pretending to answer the question.

6.

5. I use a reduced fat option on butter chicken.

4.

3. The hail was so loud I had to turn them up.

2.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. Liz could have conducted herself better.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Sunday, May 02, 2021

Top Ten Things Overheard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 569

Click here for the original at this brilliant idea, here's our own (socially-distanced) version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10.

9. Lets keep positive is wearing very thin.

8.

7. That moves all the way to the end of the seat.

6.

5. We may not change the world but I will.

4.

3. You sound like you're talking to me from a call centre.

2.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. All I could smell was damp and garlic.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.