Wednesday, July 27, 2016

Top Ten Things Overheard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 327

Click here for the original at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. It was a good little party.

9. I was down to the last 5 to be Jesus.

8. If I knew what he looked liked, I'd be much more fearful.

7. A lot like work experience, but you get paid.

6. If you ever need it, you just do this, then pick it.

5. Spencer will one day soon, get what's coming to him.

4. I'll go with you, I can wear those white pants I got cheap.

3. She had a coat on and wore it all day.

2. I fell down the kerb, I couldn't look away from my phone.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. You'd need to be, like, Bill Gates or Beyonce level famous.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Friday, July 22, 2016

Swindon Tories Fantastic Fiction 2 - Highworth Library Saved Before Public Survey & Report Written

Swindon's Tories have never let democracy or due council process get in the way of their agenda and it seems the future of Swindon's Libraries is no different.

You'll remember back in May, just before the local elections, a leaflet was circulated in Highworth making all sorts of promises about the retention of Highworth's library. Including that it would stay in the same place and retain paid staff.

Just after those elections (in which the Tories retained control of Swindon Borough Council, including the Blunsdon & Highworth seat), it was repeated by Councillor Maureen Penny (Conservative, Blunsdon & Highworth) that the promises made in the leaflet were absolutely correct and will be seen through. She went one better and said that she had gotten a verbal assurance from Councillor David Renard (Conservative, Haydon Wick & Leader of the Swindon Borough Council) and Councillor Garry Perkins (Conservative, Haydon Wick & Cabinet Member for the Economy, Regeneration, and Skills) that the points made in the leaflet would be seen through and that Councillor Renard had seen the leaflet and stands by it.

But, it wasn't until two months later that the report was published which includes the proposal to retain Highworth Library.

So why and how was Councillor Penny able to get assurances about Highworth Library two full months before the report into the future of the libraries was finished and before the public survey on Swindon Libraries (which was part of the report) had even closed (on the 29th April)?

Councillor Penny's election leaflet has 'April' above the list of library promises alongside a convenient photo of Councillor Penny and Councillor Renard as you can see below :




So why was the council report and public survey prejudged?

I'm sure it's nothing to do with it being a true blue tory seat with lots of white, well-off, retired, middle-class tory voters.

I'm sure if a Labour councillor from Parks had demanded that Park Library was promised to stay open, they would have got the same result.

Sorry, that bit's fantastic fiction.

Monday, July 18, 2016

Top Ten Things Overheard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 326

Click here for the original at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. You've got to identify your risks.

9. I'm not spending that on a handbag.

8. That's easily the tastiest thing I've ever tried in my life and I've eaten in some great pubs.

7. Forget everything I've said before, this is the absolute truth.

6. It's failing apart in my hands, why did you make me buy this?

5. It doesn't work on my phone, so I won't be falling off cliffs any time soon.

4. Sarah denied I'd said it, then slagged me off in a group message.

3. You can't expect me to drop everything just because you feel like you need to control me.

2. We're going to have a recession no matter how much you may deny it.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. Don't worry about it, it's fine, we've got our country back, isn't it great?

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Sunday, July 10, 2016

Top Ten Things Overheard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 325

Click here for the original at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. I will definitely drink to that my mate.

9. Yes I could do with a good laugh if you consider all the stuff that's happened.

8. No it's rented so that's something else I've got to consider.

7. I had it when I was at the prison, what have I done with it?

6. I sold it after he moved it for a vastly-inflated value.

5. Just because I don't want to go out with you, it doesn't mean I don't like woman.

4. Don't be so bloody self-indulgent.

3. Put that's back, that's mine, I bought that with my nectar points.

2. Then because the social heard he'd been playing it, they came round that Thursday and demanded to know what he was up to.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. You get a bonus for finishing that week's order, free shares and free tea and coffee.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Sunday, July 03, 2016

Top Ten Things Overheard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 324

Click here for the original at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. I didn't dare to expect it.

9. Beyond the realms of possibility is what you really mean to say.

8. You've just beaten such a great team.

7. There you go, I told you it would melt.

6. I kept hanging on and hanging on and hanging on and he didn't turn up.

5. People at her school were asking on Monday if they had to leave.

4. He's not representative of my views.

3. Don't talk to me about moving annual averages.

2. She's not sick, or on holiday, she's left her at her ex-husbands so she can go to see Beyonce.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. They could win the whole thing if they have lucky breaks all the way through.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Sunday, June 26, 2016

Top Ten Things Overheard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 323

Click here for the original at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. That's a nice name for the wrong spelling.

9. Yes I'm in charge now, what a shocker.

8. I thought he'd only agreed to be with her for as long as it took to get another job.

7. You'll need a plumber to fix it, I've never been very good with pipes.

6. Very kind, can I have the bit with the cheese on it?

5. He's resigned, now we've got Trump's double waiting in the wings to move in.

4. Usually when they're whispering I can hear them in the next room.

3. Cornwall voted out, now they're asking for their EU money to continue.

2. Turns out she's not entitled to vote.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. Are we spiralising the carrots or buying them pre-spiralised?

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Saturday, June 25, 2016

Top Ten Things Overheard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 322

Click here for the original at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. You've got less chance of eating something nice from Burger King.

9. I believe that he knows what he's doing most of the time.

8. I returned it after I wore it all weekend.

7. She screamed at me, chucked everything out the window and kicked me out, she just doesn't get it mate.

6. Take a moment and think about how stupid you sound.

5. Cheese, that's what it's all about.

4. Save your money for a change, you've never got any left come Friday.

3. Maybe there are more important things than your boyfriend's ego.

2. Karen reckons it's only a matter of time before it all gets exposed by the audit.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. Well Steve, cars don't drive themselves do they?

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.