Thursday, March 22, 2007

Graffiti Artists Could Lose Hands In Strong Cleansing Trial

Swindon continues the never-ending (it seems) War On Terror, (we apologise, our budget has been cut on sub-editors), War On Graffiti today with a new weapon in the battle to stop the taggers spraying everywhere.

Swindon Contractors have unveiled a brand new mixture for removing solvent paint from aerosols and marker pens from one-hundred and sixty-three different surfaces. '' We were searching for a more effective remover that we could get for a reasonable price and we stumbled on XClean2000. After testing a small amount at a controlled location, we bought a joblot from ebay.'' That comment from Alf Stanley, 56, from the Borough Council Cleansing Department.

The cleaner is being introduced this week to all hotspots effected.

Rumours that the remover is too dangerous to use have been denied after a report of a bottle being spilt near Eldene and twenty minutes later half the wall they were cleaning had dissolved have been strongly dilluted (as has the XClean2000).

Discussion has taken place by several people overheard on a number 18 bus this lunchtime that the XClean2000 should be used on the hands of taggers who break the law then the blighters wouldn't have half as much fun. Additional comments, which are unrepeatable on this site, included rounding off with the words, ''Hitler had the right idea''.

Swindon Centric Says ; We Bet It Still Doesn't Get Magic Marker Off Your Hands!

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