Town's Trees Cover The Competition ; Plus Solar Heated Pork Pies

A survey released today shows that Swindon has the highest percentage of Town land covered by trees than any other similar sized centre in the country.

At 87.59%, Swindon has the most number of trees per population head than anywhere else in the UK. That means there are 5.75 trees for every man, woman and child in the Borough.

'' This is a fantastic statistic for the town to boast about. We knew that Swindon residents are keen on being environmentally friendly, this proves it.'' That comment from Ronnie Mc-Green Nose, 48, of the Swindon Action Green Network, where even the teaspoons are from a sustainable managed source at their Rodbourne Road office.

Rumours that renegade members plan to demolish the Civic Offices this weekend, planting 523 rowen trees and build the Council a sustainable collection of treehouses has remained unconfirmed.

Swindon Centric Says ; Our sources tell us players at the County Ground will be supplied with baseball caps this autumn fitted with solar panels for heating pies sustainably at half-time.

That's what I call a result!