Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 128

"I left my transport policy on a bendy bus, has anyone seen it?"

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. The cat is called 'cat'.

9. People are just buying anything, most of it'll end up in the first recycling collection after Christmas.

8. What happened on February 17th 1998?

7. She grabs him, kisses him passionately, he's stunned, camera pans out and cut.

6. Blame bloody Dickens.

5. She said she'd be here 'in the morning', well, she's got 43 minutes left.

4. People don't talk like that any more, but I think more people should.

3. On the strike of three, we all snort.

2. Grab the oregano and lets boogie whilst we cook dinner.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. Men are just lazy, because they know that women will pick up the slack, I say we just all strike on Christmas Day and see anarchy sweep through.

Overheard something we've missed? Let us know.

It's A Small World - Swindon Twinned With Disney!

Mary Poppins appeared on a westerly breeze, over the Honda factory.

Yes, you read that right and here's the evidence. Spit-spot!

Swindon Centric Says ; Bedknobs and broomsticks! The jokes to be made about where Cinderella's Castle is and who gets to play Mickey Mouse.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 127

Will Thamesdown or Stagecoach be adding fuel cell vehicles to their fleets soon?

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. How could you not love me, now that I'm the only real man in your life?

9. Lets go downtown.

8. It'll be at an accelerated, or speeded up, rate.

7. It's 17 minutes walking distance from his work to the house.

6. Battenberg?

5. We have to go to Bristol sometime.

4. You are NOT laying a hand on me.

3. I'm 15 years old, how does he not believe me?

2. He thought no-one knew about her being pregnant, so when it got written on Facebook, that pretty much burst his bubble.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. If this delay keeps up we'll have to plan who on this bus gets to repopulate the planet.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon Buses Last Week ; 126

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. Get your voting fingers out.

9. Mum wants a tigra.

8. My responsibilities are bigger than yours.

7. Mamma put the coins in my eyes 'cos I sure don't believe what I am seeing!

6. There's always a little kid in peril, I say leave them to their own devices.

5. I like that blue shirt a lot.

4. Have M&S started to stock divorce cakes?

3. The tree actually looks rather pretty.

2. If there's ever a tornado, run to the cellar.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. But how will Swindon spend it's saved wi-fi money, that currently goes to BT and Virgin and TalkTalk... biscuits for everyone methinks!

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last (Last) Week ; 125

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. Its, it's over... I'm sorry, this is where I get off.

9. You can't fit three double-buggies on here.

8. This will knock your socks off.

7. She's lost weight but you can't really tell.

6. It's the miracle and misguidance of television that's done it.

5. Bet there's no-one else on this bus on a wet Friday that's had as big a day as me.

4. It's a big Swindon story, get me Hildy Johnson, fast!

3. When you get onto the lower deck, duck.

2. I want to go all the way, can I do that?

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. No-one can read timetables any more, it's a soon-to-be-lost skill.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last (Last, Last) Week ; 124

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. The batteries have gone flat, only had them in 3 days.

9. There's not enough news coming out of Canada, are they all okay?

8. Stop watching X-Factor, it's not creative at all.

7. God-forbid that someone should chat on the bus.

6. We'll never know what was said.

5. Wipe the tapes and we'll keep the MD out of bother.

4. I took a PKE reading.

3. The bill was a foot long.

2. Back off before I hit you with these radishes.

nd the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. He's like Sheldon from The Big Bang Theory, but slightly less funny.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last (Last, Last, Last) Week ; 123

"I'm raising bus fares in a recession, tally-ho oiks!"

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. Tight-fisted bastard.

9. You can all have a go at these.

8. We're allowed to, we've got the shoes for it.

7. Shore it up with sponge and WD 40.

6. A sex pest is just an uneducated flirter.

5. The body isn't something we talk about on the top-deck.

4. There's dust all over him.

3. Get your hand out of there.

2. Can you feel nostalgic for S Club 7?

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. It's a dirty weekend, he should come back feeling filthy.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Swindon Centric Returns - To Free, Town-Wide Internet!

Swindon Borough Council is to provide all 186,000 residents with free, town-wide wireless internet access.

Though there will be a usage limit, which can be overcome by purchasing additional access, at lower prices than current suppliers.

Swindon Centric Says ; This news sounds excellent. For years, it's been suggested that internet access will become a utility as important as water, gas and electricity. Kudos to the council for pursuing this, very brave and forward-thinking service.

People in Highworth better get ready to cancel their current suppliers, as their free service starts in a few weeks.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 122

Even in landlocked Swindon, we need to take heed of this!

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. He's lacking a minority.

9. Someone should do something about the sexual harassment going on there.

8. Yes, we still can.

7. People need to get mad.

6. Keep your eyes on the skies, it's going to be spectacular tonight.

5. Who knows what could happen in the next 17 minutes?

4. Best film in the World.

3. Worst film in the World, anything with Jennifer Aniston.

2. There was a shedding at the wedding.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. I'm going to do something exciting tonight, I promise, bathing in Turkish Delight whilst hanging from the Severn Bridge.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last (Last) Week ; 121

Don't let her break you!

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. He'll win a nobel prize for bone-idleness.

9. About 45,000 people die of lack of healthcare in the US every year, because they can't afford it.

8. He's the MP for Kensington and Moredon.

7. We were home before you, and we walked.

6. There's been no progress at all on tracking that asteroid.

5. When did people get paranoid about vaccines?

4. I want to run into the film and shout, "he dies at the end."

3. Sometimes, shouting is the only answer.

2. I don't believe in olive oil.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. I'm coming onto you, if that wasn't fully clear.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last (Last, Last) Week ; 120

If more people wore hats, this blog wouldn't exist!

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. Start the clock.

9. It sits between two areas.

8. They got distracted by the bright and shiny object.

7. Add that together with 'inflate' and you've got a great evening.

6. I threw up thinking about the Flintstones.

5. Speaking of zebras.

4. It's a long term aim of mine, to have a shoe room.

3. People took to the streets to celebrate.

2. Before we get there, we're here first.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. Join us, before it's too late and some cult gets you.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 119

"Me pips have gone!"

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. Keep your mouth shut when they get onboard.

9. Can I take your coat?

8. Like the toilets, it's pay as you go.

7. I don't even know what it means.

6. We're fat in the forties.

5. Shame shame shame shame shame!

4. 34 percent of the time he's wrong with a vengeance.

3. I need to eat more avocado.

2. We might lose the word 'glee' all together.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. I don't know about you, but I never come first.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 118

"Keep your voice down!"

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. I'm attacking drunk drivers.

9. We've created a boogie man.

8. I wouldn't mind working with her again, I like her highlights.

7. He's pencilled in for a good pounding.

6. Speaking of your wrinkly feet.

5. You need more than one friend, otherwise we won't talk to you.

4. At the moment he's getting away with it, but I've been counting the paperclips.

3. You look rather sassy.

2. It's uncomfortable and it's bad for my back.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. Oh yes, team white-heat!

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 117

"Ssssh!"

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. It goes through your mind every time you see her.

9. I couldn't keep my eyes off them.

8. We're trimming fat.

7. We're the only modern country that doesn't recognise the true value of sherbet.

6. Cost will double, then you'll be sorry.

5. It's jealousy, but you didn't hear that from me.

4. The booing was fine, it was the cabbage throwing that he objected to.

3. MGMT, turn it up.

2. The doors are in different places.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. You know your workplace has reached a certain standard when you get a laminator.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 116

"These walls have ears."

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. It's too claustrophobic, I prefer a ceiling that lets you see the sky.

9. If Derren Brown knew the numbers, why didn't he keep it quiet and buy a ticket?

8. You can't see out the windows on those seats.

7. I've got pegs, thanks.

6. He's a primary school teacher, he's got a boyish face and he can sing, he's bound to win, it's been edited that way.

5. Being traditional is hugely overrated.

4. That buggy wouldn't fit in a HGV.

3. The point of the phone is that you don't have to SHOUT to the person at the other end.

2. I expect nothing less than success.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. You've bought four packets of brioche, we don't eat it, just because it was on offer, twat.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 115

You never know who might be listening!

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. The flags give the cakes a nice international flavour.

9. Give him my number.

8. They threw the switch and I could feel the electricity begin to throb.

7. Don't pass go, don't collect your poppyseed muffin.

6. It's not addressed correctly, it'll end up being eaten by a sorting machine.

5. Grab your bearings and lets let the finance team have it.

4. The devolution's in the detail.

3. I haven't got my ipod, what am I gonna do?

2. Why does avoiding wheat mean I'm going to recover quicker from a cold?

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. What's all this about people being angry about violins on television?

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

From Dabbers To Rockers

The trend for reuse of existing buildings (that were previously earmarked for demolition) continues with the former Mecca Bingo hall at Regent Circus.

It's now been confirmed that the new owner's intention is to turn it into a venue for live music.

Swindon Centric recalls the cackhanded way the closure was handled.

And comments about the asbestos making the building "impossible" to use, really weren't accurate then, were they?

Swindon Centric Says ; The tented market, the new music venue, lets keep this revival of shuttered buildings going...

A New Start For The New Swindon Company?

The news that the Chief Executive of The New Swindon Company is to step down should be a moment to assess exactly what the organisation is for.

The schemes that is came up with were, no doubt, grand, but they have nearly all fallen by the wayside, mostly due to the recession.

But, getting down to the nitty gritty of physically doing things seems to have been the job of Swindon Borough Council. As it says under the 'Local Forum' heading in the 'Blog' section on their site, "delivering regeneration... is a long-term plan...so if you don’t hear anything new for a while it does not mean we have stopped."

Under Mr James direction, the opposite seems to have been the case, with each tiny step publicised to within an inch of it's life.

Swindon Centric Says ; Good wishes for whatever Mr James goes onto, but in Swindon, we now need to know the answers to two questions...

1. Who is really in charge of driving and delivering Swindon's rebuilding, The New Swindon Company or Swindon Borough Council?

2. Will Mr James' replacement knuckle down to the painstaking details and only been seen in the press when we have a viable, inspiring plan and cranes on the horizon?

In The Market For A Sturdy Tent

The tented market is to reopen, after several failed attempts at replacement with designs that were very average to say the least.

Previous tenants have voiced concern at the increase in the rental rates compared to what they were paying before the market was closed in late 2007. However as Simon Ormrod (from the management company in charge of the market, Keningtons) says in the Adver article, "we don't just want 50 mobile phone shops." The great thing is, not only is Mr Ormrod talking about a better range of shops, but he's in a position to actually influence that, to a degree.

Anyone else want to become a warrior for taste and standards in the town centre's retail side?

Swindon Centric Says ; It'll be excellent to see the market reopen and hope that there is greater diversity in the shops available, along with the quality of them.

Swindon Architecture Nearly Had To Clear Royal Hurdle

As if good architecture doesn't have enough hurdles to clear before being realised in Swindon, this investigation from The Guardian shows that the National Trust headquarters, Heelis, at Churchward nearly didn't exist in the form we know it today, thanks to Prince Charles.

Swindon Centric Says ; Full marks to National Trust for standing their ground and backing the design that was constructed. It's a very welcome addition.

Made In Swindon 4 - Wharf Green Sculpture Returns, Hooray!

When the Wharf Green work started a few years ago, the Blondis sculpture was removed and sort-of forgotten about.

However, the refurbished playground at St Mark's Recreation Ground has had a welcome addition, with the sculpture of the two circus performers installed.

Swindon Centric Says ; Good to see, after the Golden Lion Bridge mural restoration, that this piece of Swindon's art has also been retained and restored. Could this possibly be a reemergence of Thamesdown Borough Council's art policy in the 70s and 80s, we shall keep looking for further evidence.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 114

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. Lets get the ball rolling, to prevent misunderstanding.

9. They break for tea, no other sport does that, how British.

8. A holiday is to be endured, not enjoyed.

7. You can't be that fashionable on the number 20.

6. No that's legal, but that one, the red one, most certainly isn't.

5. It was a three-course delight with a pile of excellence placed on top.

4. They all rhymed, which was a novelty and really brightened up the meeting.

3. I'm doubling how much I charge now too.

2. I was shoved right up against the wall and it took me ten minutes to get my breath back.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. The waiter practically propositioned me there and then, but I had already called for a fast black, otherwise, who knows?

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Tunneling For Accuracy In West Swindon

The Adver gave front page coverage (and rightly so) to the vandalism on the Great Western Main Line at Stratton Green Bridge, where a trainwas seriously damaged by vandals placing steel reinforced blocks across the 'Up' line.

Later in the story, Mr Jackson-Haines, Operations Manager at Network Rail is mentioned as informing the paper about the £50,000 cost of removing graffiti from tunnels near Blagrove.

But, there aren't any tunnels at Blagrove, there's several bridges.

Swindon Centric Says ; I'm not sure which is worse, a newspaper getting the term wrong, or someone from Network Rail getting fuzzy on the differences between tunnels and bridges.

Conservatives Motorist Vote-Winning, Veering All Over The Road

Another day, another car-related story from the road-obsessed Borough Council.

After spinning the possibility of cutting the car parking charges in two town centre locations, the council confirmed it. They then however, have deferred, until today, deciding on changes to residents parking in streets off Commercial Road.

Rather like CSI : Crime Scene Investigation, the council then spun off the same story to a different location and former mayor, Mike Bawden called for cuts in the car parking charges for Old Town.

But cracks have appeared in the plans for cuts, with Councillor Nick Martin asking where the money will come from to pay for it.

Swindon Centric Says ; Couldn't they use the vast amount of money they claim to have saved by closing the Groundwell Park & Ride?

Swindon Centric Equation : Closing Park & Ride + Cutting Town Centre Car Park Charges ÷ Changing Residents Parking Permits = Integrated Transport Policy.

Reporting Could Do With A Little Guidance

Kudos to the Adver for being one of the few to cover the story of Jan Gibson and her guide dog Dipper.

Swindon Centric Says ; Perhaps such a positive story could have been put higher up in the priority stakes, rather than on page eleven? But, credit for covering it all the same.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 113

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. It was a threatening message, wrapped in a lemon drizzle cake.

9. We are bound to get caught up in the whole furore.

8. You speak as if you have authority, but you know that you know nothing, right?

7. Huge organic onions on special offer, I'm there!

6. Pixie Lott, the most un-rock and roll name in history, ever.

5. My hopes are high, he's bought a ring.

4. Don't give me that rubbish, you know that he's letting another four of us go.

3. It's exact change only, or you lose an eye.

2. Futurama is coming back, I'm so excited.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. I think that the news reporting on exams getting easier, has gotten easier.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses (Week Before) Last Week ; 112

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. It's an old Motown record.

9. It's gathered like moss in a crevice.

8. The fresh start starts... here, NOW!

7. The route terminates when the road runs out.

6. They use to say 'keep calm, carry on', I long to bring it back.

5. Don't be patronised, but Jane that's not right.

4. 18 delays so far this morning.

3. I whacked her in the ankles with the doors, I laughed like Sid James.

2. Shove your TravelPass where the sun don't shiny, sweetie.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. Jazz and drinks, we were the youngest people there, it was like a musical version of Cocoon.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 111

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. I wasn't invested in the characters enough.

9. I would agree with you in the sense that you are wrong.

8. He went to my school and is still a prick.

7. He can't drink alcohol anymore, so he's taken up snuff.

6. Four-pounds ten, but I've rounded it up to a fiver.

5. They promised to me they'd report back.

4. These ones rattle like a haunted horse and carriage.

3. Don't you dare think you can steal from me in a romantic way.

2. The new season is starting soon, hoorah!

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. Oh look, here comes the walking, talking shopper-without-portfolio.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

University At Coate? No! Houses? Maybe Next Time...

As Komadori has made clear, the decision to refuse planning permission for the area next to Coate Water shows how that a University on the site won't happen. But it appears the Secretary of State is quite taken with the houses idea ;

The Secretary of State agrees with the Inspector that… the appeal proposals have the potential to deliver high quality housing,… make a meaningful contribution to identified housing needs and are in a suitable location in principle for an urban extension. He gives significant weight to this factor.

It needs to be clear that Swindon Borough Council's objections were the ones that were agreed with by the Secretary of State, rather than the objections from the campaigners. They need to regroup and get ready for a new application for housing from another developer which is bound to come at some point and take any proposal to pieces and prod it in a forensic manner.

Swindon Centric Says ; Praise where praise is due, well done Swindon Borough Council on their work to show the holes in this proposal and congratulations to the campaigners.

Now, tomorrow's story will be the launching of a coherent plan by Swindon Borough Council to build a university within the town centre. Won't it?

The Answer Lies In The Lanterns

There were no aliens in the sky above Pinehurst, they were Chinese lanterns, what a surprise.

Swindon Centric Says ; Can we upgrade to seeing aliens walking around the town, like they do in Bournemouth?

The Answer May Be In the Skies, But Not The Statistics

As Komadori has posted, there's no evidence to back-up the headline 'Pinehurst People Feel Safe - Survey' by citing 38 out of 55 returned questionnaires from a small part of a larger area of town.

If the people of Pinehurst have anything to fear for certain, it's the UFOs above the area.

Swindon Centric Says ; STOP PRESS! This rumour just in - The UFOs are chinese lanterns fashioned out of unreturned questionnaires and launched by residents.

One For Your Links

The Broad Street Area Community Council website is a no-nonsense page, featuring all news filtered and presented that's relevant to the area.

Details include local events, planning applications and the minutes from police meetings.

Swindon Centric Says ; If you live in the Broad Street area, this should be one of your go-to sites.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 110

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. He took me to one side, the other side was occupied.

9. Don't do the obvious, do the strange.

8. It's a ghost bus, there's never anyone on it, not even a driver.

7. Stop picking at it, it'll get worse.

6. Jordan's got swine flu, poor thing.

5. I'm a petite size 9.

4. Making anything rhyme with Malcolm isn't easy.

3. I have half an hour before they threaten me again.

2. The sandwich is toast.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. Something just fell off the bus, just above the driver's neck!

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Caution : Unmapped Road Ahead

Swindon switched off it's fixed speed cameras yesterday because the Borough Council doesn't feel the £320,000 it spends per year is value for money for five cameras.

Wiltshire Police will still monitor motorists with mobile units and speed guns.

The money is to be used instead for other strategies to improve and maintain road safety... but even the council aren't sure what they are yet. “We believe there are better ways we can reduce the accidents on our roads than just through the use of speed cameras" , says Councillor Greenhalgh, but then doesn't say what methods will be employed instead.

Councillor Greenhalgh then goes on to let us know how much he doesn't like speed humps either. Judging by the speed hump issue in Freshbrook (they are to be gotten rid of, as reported in the latest issue of The Link Magazine), he seems to be well on his way to winning the votes of motorists for his party nationally at the next election.

The drive for popularity and votes for the Conservatives is reenforced by Councillor Greenhalgh's comment in the Council press release on the issue, "In Swindon we are developing a reputation for challenging the status quo and being at the forefront of new thinking." That sounds like they're excited at getting all this attention from the other children at school. Golly!

Swindon Centric Says ; The press release even states that they will "continue to work on a new road safety strategy."
Wouldn't it have been logical to have a new safety strategy in place before switching off the cameras? Once again, it seems joined-up-thinking has passed Swindon councillors by, at a great, unchecked speed.

Bar the work by Wiltshire Constabulary and their speeding equipment, Swindon's road safety strategy appears to be, 'we'll keep our fingers crossed and keep a sharp eye out'.

Made In Swindon 3 - First Town Redevelopment Area Looks A Picture

Despite the relatively unpredictable weather over the last few weeks, local artist Ken White has done stirling work on repainting his mural. Swindon Centric talked to Ken last week and he remarked that he would dart for cover into the small container when the rain began, fortunately none of the repainting has run in the wet weather.

Swindon Centric Says ; Ken expected to be finished by the end of today.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 109

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. She's the grandmother-in-chief.

9. The clock is running.

8. Road humps be damned, here I go!

7. It smells worse than Destiny's armpit.

6. You say potato, I say ; potential chip-based meal.

5. They are mounting like a pile of unsold cardboard recycling.

4. He wrote the whole series and didn't go mad.

3. I know all the lyrics, but don't know the tune.

2. The cholesterol is washing over me right now.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. When they misspelt my job, 'booker' on the website, I had to change my phone number.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 108

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. I faked an English accent all the way home.

9. A stand-up bloke if there ever was one.

8. Would you like to get a cup of coffee?

7. There are no depths to which he will plunge.

6. You have to tell her the truth, that one leg is shorter than the other.

5. Don't sit there, that seat is cursed.

4. Deep, deep down, I wonder what she's thinking.

3. Your sense of style could put the fear of the devil into Donna Karan.

2. The flooding is a ploy, there is a secret plot afoot in this town.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. He died with his balloon on.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Twice The News, Half The Story, None Of The Redevelopment

There seems to be some (more than usual) confusion emerging about a town centre developer going into administration this weekend.

As Swindon Centric reported Thursday, Swindon Borough Council officially announced that the Regent Place plan was dead, due to "Modus Ventures' financial difficulties" (read financial difficulties as, in administration) on Tuesday. This was despite Modus being reported as in administration on 29th of May by the BBC.

Swindon Centric Says ; So, there isn't ANOTHER developer going bust, it's still Modus. Meanwhile, we're still waiting for our town centre.

For One Bus, The Number Is Up

No, the headline doesn't refer to a service being withdrawn, indeed, some buses seem to be thriving, in stark contrast to others.

According to their Annual Report for the year to April, Stagecoach West lists the number 49 route (Swindon to Trowbridge via Devizes), the 'Trans-Wilts Express' as seeing a 14.8% increase in passengers.

Hooray to all staff and passengers!

Swindon Centric Says ; Will this inspire Swindon Borough Council to reinvigorate the Groundwell Park & Ride and make it work? Probably not.

Musing On The Mode Of Town Centre's Stagnation

Swindon Borough Council have now officially announced that the Regent Place scheme, championed by Modus, is dead.

However we're assured that the Union Square (old Fleming Way Post Office site) scheme, to be carried out by Muse, is "moving ahead".

But this small piece of news from last year shows an ironic twist. A celebratory lunch (was it on expenses? Surely not!), organised by Anne Snelgrove MP wasn't attended by the group it was arranged for, Muse (in recognition of the Union Square deal). So instead, the crustless sandwiches and little cakes were in honour of the people from Modus, celebrating the Regent's Regent Place deal.

Oh the irony.

Swindon Centric Says ; If the Union Square scheme gets built, I'll give Anne Snelgrove and everyone at the New Swindon Company a jam donut*. Probably, depending on the current economic conditions and what the response of the market is to a donut-based investment in the vibrant hub that is Swindon.

* Offer is subject to withdrawal at anytime.

New Wedding Service Route

Swindon Centric is wondering if the wedding gossip will turn up on next week's top ten list.

Congratulations to Elaine and Mark.

Swindon Centric Says ; New route, exact 'yes' or 'no' only please, no waiting.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 107

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. I would only ever consider that if I was a major lead in a soap.

9. I hear they got it worse in the street opposite.

8. Grab your cockles and lets go.

7. The 14, 29, then 1 and 1A.

6. Why does everyone have to like The Beatles?

5. Sarah Perry is hotter than a bag of chips.

4. I'm meant to get off at the stop after the shopping centre, which one?

3. Keep your eyes on me and see if I lie.

2. I have a selection of options available, but I can't remember any of them.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. Would you care to start with a cocktail, or should we just get down to it?

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Mural Restoration - The Excellent Side Of Regeneration

The New Swindon Company may have been around since the town centre didn't quite look as bad as it does now, but not much has happened of note since then.

So Swindon Centric declares that the best part of anything in the town centre is the repainting of the Golden Lion Bridge Mural by it's creator, Ken White.

Swindon Centric Says ; You can tell this isn't a New Swindon Company project, because this one is actually going to happen.

Where else should we have a new generation of murals in Swindon? Ideas welcome.

Made In Swindon 2 - Music - The Boy Done Good Single, Out Now

Letting you know that local band, The Boy Done Good, have their debut single, Walk On Woman (the video of which is above) out now, to download on itunes, play.com, plus the B-side, You See Her, the video for which is below.

Swindon Centric Says ; As she comes and she goes, walk on woman.

Councillors Keep Hands Off Lifeboat Plug... For Now

As Komadori has noted, the council seem to be taking a very picky attitude to anyone who's a street trader in the town centre, which in a recession seems foolhardy.

The one saving grace, at least, for the minute, is the delaying on making a decision until the committee has more information (a shocking flash of honesty there).

Swindon Centric Says ; Similar to pulling a plughole out of a lifeboat after the ship has sunk and the lifeboat is all you have. Those street traders better invest in some armbands.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 106

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. She's hot, take a look.

9. Have you tried readjusting your RAM?

8. The icing thicken rather too quickly for my liking.

7. She'll go into the next year with a new tutor and an old attitude.

6. I shouted, threw a few things, seemed to do the trick.

5. We're at a category 3, when it goes up to 4, things will start falling from the sky.

4. I'm sick of people going on about the weather, but it has been hot, hasn't it?

3. Once they reach the end of the route the driver gets out and has a little dance.

2. Your positive thoughts have been duly noted but I'm still scared to death.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. I can't believe I've just had a letter from Marks & Sparks recalling my three year old hammock, due to weather deterioration.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Made In Swindon - Blog - Graham Carter's Foghorn Bloghorn

Searching for pictures for use in the bus list for last week and the week before, I stumbled on Graham Carter's blog, with the fantastic name The Foghorn Bloghorn.

Swindon Centric Says ; There's a link to Graham's site in the right hand column and here's one too, a great addition to Swindon's online presence.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 105

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. It's their golden years, more like gold-plated.

9. I couldn't even spell the word, never mind say it.

8. It's a fares boundary, like a church, it's hallowed and special ground.

7. By now the situation's a level playing field.

6. It's a press release from a marketing company dressed up in a news story's clothes.

5. There are several reasons I didn't go, none of which are true.

4. Whether they might try and tell, you should never try and bake a fishcake.

3. I'm easy, but don't put that around, I have a reputation to uphold.

2. They didn't have any unconcentrated orange juice, so I had a double-brandy.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. His car sounds like a washing machine which could be a cunning marketing ploy, but he never said so if it was.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Brunel Tries To Hold Back The Tide

This was the scene this morning at ten o'clock at the Havelock Street entrance to the Brunel Centre. Just before the picture was taken, three or four white-shirted managers surveyed the work with brooms, before vanishing, no doubt for a cup of tea.

Swindon Centric Says ; It's unconfirmed at this hour whether the barricade was an effort to stem the flow of water after the previous half-hour's downpour, or to keep back the tide of low quality shopping in Havelock Square. It's also uncertain if either effort was successful.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 104

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. It's not your fault, what an excuse.

9. We bonded over belgian buns.

8. My primary school is incredibly small, either that, or I got really big.

7. Glasses, contact lenses and chicken all reduced.

6. I was pushed into this, I wanted to be on the 19.

5. Everything can be recycled, nearly.

4. She's arriving in about 7 minutes, give or take 10 minutes.

3. It doesn't get much bigger than this, look.

2. If you wear a face mask, it doesn't show you're responsible, it shows that you want attention.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. You really can't argue with a woman of that build.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Top Ten Poetry Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 103

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

Don't forget this too, poetry for every bus user.

10. I'll bet we'll be about five minutes late.

9. Please take a bite of this excellent cake.

8. The 14 or 29, it really doesn't matter.

7. Portion control's a myth, you'll still get fatter.

6. No, drinking that here is a fineable crime.

5. I've told you twice, get in the line.

4. Single or Travelpass, plus a pensioner to boot.

3. Don't look now, but that was my foot.

2. 'Formidable', or 'Daring' you could say at best.

1. 'Saints, 'Earls' and 'Westerns' making up the rest.

A special thanks to Komadori for throwing down the gauntlet for this week!

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

The Need For An Extra-Large Swindon

The need for a rolling programme of building work on all edges of the town has been reenforced with the consultation on the Eastern Development Area.

Never mind about the houses still being built in North Swindon, or the lonely looking few houses in the very green Front Garden, lets get strategised for constant growth up to the middle of the century.

Swindon Centric Says ; The consultation ends on the 15th of June, so if you wish to, make your voices heard.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 102

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. I think I'm going to get harassed, which I'm strangely looking forward to.

9. It means nothing if we don't get above 37%.

8. Justifying that is like trying to argue that less trees are good for sawmills.

7. Operation Chocolate is officially launched!

6. That's awfully polite of them, we accept.

5. Birth control pills are harmful, especially if you're trying for a baby.

4. I'm looking forward to the small stubby pencils.

3. Then we get all this money to expand transport, madness.

2. An old-fashioned sweet shop, right here in Swindon.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. He drove hell-for-leather to get here, realised there was no-one in and kicked in the front door, he didn't even leave a note, how rude.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Made In Swindon - Music - The Boy Done Good

Starting a new strand here on Swindon Centric, 'Made In Swindon' aims to showcase that far from being a cultural desert, there's genius in this town, if you care to look...

Hence, The Boy Done Good and their single, Walk On Woman, which is being released on 29th of June.



Swindon Centric Says ; The song is even being talked about on the buses.

Town Centre Starts To Crumble

Since we're going to have to wait an awfully long time before any significant development happens in the town centre (apart from the BHS rebuild), the next best course should be maintaining what we currently have.

But oh no.

The stopped Jubilee clock has been unplugged for nearly a year and neither Swindon Borough Council, nor the Brunel Centre, who supplied the power, seem to care about it. How difficult can it be to plug a clock back in?'. Now, along with the empty shops and the stopped clock, we can put down the incredibly poor quality paving that runs around the outside of the Brunel Centre. Specifically the stretch from Havelock Square to Regent Street. Swindon Centric witnessed a man trip over the uneven storm drain covers that run where the old Brunel Centre canopy roofs used to stand. He didn't just trip, he nearly ended up smashing his face on the uneven and broken paving slabs.

The quality of the flooring is in stark contrast to that in Regent Street, which is in far better shape and brightens up the shopping street.

Swindon Centric Says ; Is the Brunel Centre going to bring their paving outside the centre up to an acceptable standard? In this case, they are being shown up by the Council, which isn't a comparison to be proud of.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 101

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. It's called Walk On Woman, by The Boy Done Good.

9. I can see her intentions from here, especially when she bends down.

8. Probably use it for landfill or something.

7. What does the 'a la mode' mean when people have apple pie?

6. You better have put cream on that, I'm not rubbing it in.

5. Sadistic, like the person who keeps re-commissioning Last Of The Summer Wine.

4. Such a beautiful horizon.

3. Every other person is huge, like Chief Wiggum on holiday.

2. 'Crop circles in Lawns', now there's a headline.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. Park & Ride is too modern an invention for the Council to work out how to run, they're all being sent on training courses to use their kettles next week.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Missing The Stop ; Transport Policy Can't Keep To Time

The inability of Swindon Borough Council to have a coherent transport policy is the one clear thing to emerge from the murk of the closure of the Groundwell Park & Ride.

After ten years of operating the Park & Ride from the Groundwell (formerly The Copse) site, the Council decided to close it, due to a lack of sufficient numbers to cover the cost. This failure of policy (how long do you need to make changes to a service to make it cost neutral, ten years would seem to be more than enough time?) has been clouded with councillors now saying that the Groundwell site was in the wrong place all along, the phrase, a poor workman blames his tools, springs to mind.

The Groundwell closure, combined with the news of the extension of the number 11 into Wichelstowe, with council subsidy, (a district with just one family in residence) shows a vast lack of joined-up-thinking in the transport policy.

Firstly, the council was unwilling to subsidise the Park & Ride at Groundwell further. But, if over 10 YEARS, the council had worked to make it revenue neutral and tried, it wouldn't have to.

Secondly, the council is willing to subsidise the route extension of the 11 into East Wichel, before a bulk of people move in, because it believes it's better to have a service up and running before people are there to use it.

Thirdly, the 11 is a route that combines a usual service route with that of serving the Wroughton Park & Ride site. Did the council learn nothing from this route, that they could have combined the Groundwell site with a current route and share costs through cross-subsidising?

Swindon Centric Says ; Swindon, overall, has an excellent bus network, development over the last years has seen more regular evening services, the GPS at bus stops (for Thamesdown only) and a young fleet of modern vehicles, from both Stagecoach and Thamesdown.

However, our inability to operate more grown up 'add-ons', like Park & Ride and night buses, smacks of a town that comes across as amateurish and that doesn't pay attention to detail when it comes to vital core policies.

If other places can do these, why can't we?

Hide & Ride ; Transport Policy Gets Thrown Under The Bus

So, did Thamesdown Transport apply within the 56 days and keep it under wraps, or under the shorter timescale?

Either way, the last three days of the Groundwell Park & Ride are the final gasps of Swindon Borough Council's corpse of a transport policy.

Swindon Centric Says ; In the end, the Council didn't want it to stay open, if they had, they would have merged it with the 17 or some altered service to keep it open.

The decision had already been made before the consultation happened, full stop.

Park & Ride Has Two Numbers On It's Side - 56 & 17

The recent rumours about the closure details of the Groundwell (The Copse) seem to have omitted one small, but important, detail.

Under the 1985 Transport Act, a period of 56 days notice is required before a change to a bus service.

However, an application may be made at short notice for various reasons, including 'to meet an urgent and exceptional public passenger transport requirement', or, 'for reasons which could not have been foreseen at 56 days notice.'

Now bar the transport commissioner interpreting the 'urgent and exceptional' or 'not have been foreseen at 56 days' as the council being incapable of formulating a transport policy and believing in it, looks like the 56 days grace will apply before any closure.

Swindon Centric Says ; Just divert a current service bus,(17 perhaps?) into the park and ride and allow the facility to continue in use while allowing a more successful route to absorb some of the cost.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 100 Not Out

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. I always get those two mixed up.

9. Never mind his eyes, I think he needs an IQ test.

8. Looking right over her shoulder at me.

7. Ben Affleck was surprisingly good.

6. It's on it's last legs.

5. The Illuminati runs most of Swindon, weekdays only of course.

4. It's all based on anti-matter, which isn't the most solid of foundations.

3. They now do breakfast, which is a form of small evolution, as they now cover all the days meals from dawn till dusk.

2. There was more interference than you'd expect with an aerial of that size.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. It's the last of the series, now I can get back to having a life, of sorts.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 99

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. Celebrate diversity, yeah, we did all that.

9. I'll have to stop you right there, because I really don't care.

8. It's being diverted, which should be, well, diverting.

7. Take the 2, the 14 or whichever even number you like, they all go there eventually.

6. It's all funny voices and hackneyed old jokes, how funny.

5. It's a tradeoff between letting it fall to pieces because it's not 100% original, or having a functional building with modifications.

4. It's what makes me the delight that I am, even at 7.30 in the morning.

3. He wasn't in the room, it doesn't matter, that's the end of it.

2. Black pumps would set off the trousers perfectly.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. They reported it to me, I weighed the pros and cons and didn't agree with them not one, single bit.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Oh So Quiet... Granville Street Development On Hold

A day after the scheme for the residential tower at Regent Circus was shelved, due to the recession, another part of another area due for building has been announced to be going the same way, fast.

The Regent Place (not to be confused with the college site at Regent Circus) area of 'The Hub' area of the rebuilding of the town centre, on the Granville Street carpark, has been shelved for the moment as the retail sector readjusts during the recession.

An attempt at reassurance came out of Councillor Young that the 'Union Square' area (formerly called 'The Exchange' and located on the swathes of land between Fleming Way, the bus station and the railway station) is signed and sealed contract-wise.

Swindon Centric Says ; The New Swindon Company don't seem to be doing much to justify their existence, except renaming the development areas as a marketing team might do the same for a theme park.

Expecting a runaway mine money train to be put into the plans for Regent Place any day now, once the market picks up of course.

Every Little Helps, But Tesco Might Not Be At Regent Circus

Where Swindon Centric leads, others follow, with the Adver today publishing details about the Regent Circus back-and-forth discussions.

So the majority of the scheme is still alive, but the tower plan has been put on hold for the moment, maybe after the recession it'll rise with the green shoots. But the supermarket will either be Morrisons, Waitrose, Somerfield (soon to be the Co-op) or Tesco.

Swindon Centric Says ; As long as the cinema scheme is retained, then, after 5pm, the area won't go dead like most of the town centre at the moment.

Every Little Helps With Regent Circus Development

A short story on BBC Radio Wiltshire this morning suggested that contracts are on the verge of being signed for the supermarket that will be part of the Regent Circus development. This ties with this post at the end of last month about the redevelopment negotiations.

Coincidentally, an overheard conversation in the town centre today suggested that Tesco, currently hidden away underneath Debenhams, will relocate "further up town".

Swindon Centric Says ; Will it be Tesco that will sit on the former college site?

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 98

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. Don't start until you get enough.

9. Get out of the shower now.

8. Apparently, Swindon wasn't amused by Franz Ferdinand.

7. No-one wears a watch anymore.

6. Sensational isn't too strong a word.

5. That wind couldn't be stiffer if it had been starched and ironed.

4. I've had comments from others and they don't like it either.

3. You've lost your locking nut, I can tell from the rattling.

2. Don't sit there, are you mad?

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. It was funny, but only to those in a suicidal mood, that crowd isn't that discerning.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 97

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. I'm innocent on all charges.

9. It was absolute durge.

8. People are suffering in Coleview too you know.

7. The clock still doesn't work.

6. It's amazing the cost of carrier bags these days.

5. I suffocated her with a mountain of memos.

4. It's very full, but at some point, everyone will get off.

3. It's reasonable to assume I'm going to be late.

2. I'm soo outside the bubble, I can't even see it.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. Coming soon, an exciting new joke on that, I'm working on it.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 96

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. I'm open to the idea, though I'm not mad about it.

9. The tape was entirely wiped, there's no evidence.

8. At least in this dress, no one can see my intentions.

7. They're moving all the stops.

6. How many bags can I safely carry onto the bus?

5. My stop, hurrah!

4. I find it quite pleasing, keep going.

3. It takes a while but drops me right outside.

2. He hasn't been on a bus for years, I doubt he'd know what to do.

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. I hate it when you're standing and get a text, you can't answer, I've tried it, you fail at both things at once.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.

Top Ten Things Heard On Swindon's Buses Last Week ; 95

Click here for the original and still the best at this brilliant idea, here's our own version for Swindon's buses from last week.

10. Even if you wanted to, why would you steal all that toothpaste?

9. It's played by a large number of men with odd shaped balls.

8. So long, until tomorrow.

7. That seems to be a mighty big omission, does it not.

6. It's only open for 3 days a week, 4 months a year.

5. I find that if I wait until the corner to press the bell, it keeps them on their toes.

4. It's a fish based dish, he said he didn't like salmon, but ate three and must have liked it.

3. I start every day by asking myself, "why not?"

2. How many more things can Ricky Gervais make that aren't funny?

And the number one overheard phrase on Swindon's buses from last week is...

1. A councillor got asked about the non-working clock and appeared to be stumped.

Overheard something we've missed? Then let us know.